Day 9: Hey Kid Wanna Yiff?

Welcome to another installment of useless shit you could care less to know but think it might be an interesting conversation starter. With that said I bring you to the topic of the day, "Yiffing". Now as self explanatory as this picture is, we will be delving into the world of Furries and learning their ways of yiffing, yipping, yerfing, yarfing, growling, growlfing fun...or something like that.

So you, the clueless reader might be asking yourself by now "what the fuck is this guy talking about"? Well the sub-cultural fetish of being a "Furry" has bloomed over the years of mainstream Internet usage. Essentially, the beginning of the Furry culture started off as a tangent discussion related to a science fiction book in the 80's. Nerds ate up the whole "fictional mammalian anthropomorphic characters" (animals that look like and take on human characteristics) idea like a bag of Cheeto's. They loved the art and ideas of putting animals in human roles. The "Furry Fandom" took on a whole new level when they began publishing fanzines with different collections of Furry artwork. With fanzines on the shelf, the population of Furries grew. It grew to the point where in 1987 there were enough fans to stage the first Furry convention. Then the Internet arrived, changing the ways Furries would communicate. Text based role plays, websites, and chat rooms were all factors in creating what the Furry community is now.

Furry- a person with an important emotional/spiritual connection with an animal or animals, real fictional, or symbolic.

Now it is a community of anthropomorphic animal characters created by people so they can use it as their "fursonas" (I'm sure you all have enough brains to figure that one out) for Internet forums, emailing, and live role playing. "Role playing also takes place offline, with petting, hugging and "scritching" (light scratching and grooming) common between friends at social gatherings. Fursuits or furry accessories can enhance the experience." (Thank you Wiki).

Now to dig a bit deeper and see what perverted creatures lay behind some of these suits. Its seems to be that there is a decent sized population of the Furries that are involved in furry intercourse aka.. yiffing. Furry erotica is behind it all. Playing to different paraphilias, Furry erotica encompasses a range of fetishes that would mostly be illegal or impossible and makes a fantasy true for that guy in his alligator fursuit. Obviously this has brought up plenty of legal issues and not to mention has attracted our good friends PETA. For reasons I do not need to explain, we all understand why this is looked down upon.

In my opinion? Let them be free to fantasize.

Who are we to judge? Because really, I think that in the end even if we aren't middle aged nerds jacking off to anthropomorphic animal characters that are sniffing each other, we still have quirks that might make us as weird or even weirder.

It's all in the eye of the beholder I guess....

...and I guess this one wears a fursuit.

Just as a side note, Furries are generally against wearing fur.

Day 8: If I Were Rich, I'd Own a Hitler

Let me get something straight before I go forward with this entry. Personally I don't give a shit about 4/20 being the day of smoking, toking, and other weed related activities. The only thing I found interesting about 4/20 this year was the D.C. council unanimously approving medical marijuana. Good timing there D.C. As interesting as this might be to some of you, that is not the topic today. If you didn't get wind of the news, it is also Hitlers Birthday today and in celebration we will be discussing the history of Adolf the painter.

For those of you that like to throw the fact that Hitler was a painter into a conversation try to impress those that failed high school history, I'm here to help you put some facts behind the claim. Adolf's artistic lifestyle all started with his move to Vienna on an orphan's pension and child support from his mother. While his primary pursuit was an interest in painting, the Academy of Fine Arts Vienna turned him away on the claim that his real talent is architecture. Even though his educational path had turned his to architecture, school was out of the option. Having been a rebellious high school student, he did not fulfill the educational requirements to be accepted.

Adolf was forced to turn to a path of self-educating and constant practicing. He relied on copying scenes from postcards and selling his work to merchants and tourists who were willing to buy. It didn't take long till Adolf went flat out broke. In December of 1909, due to financial issues he found himself homeless. Freezing and starving, he moved into a shelter for the homeless. His daily diet became whatever was served at the soup kitchen operated by nuns from a local convent. In February 1910, Adolf started making whatever money he could as a day laborer, shoveling snow, and carrying bags at the Vienna train station. With money in his pocket he moved into a home for poor men (Meldemannstraße dormitory).

Though it seemed like his art career was over, with a stroke of pure inspiration Adolf had realized he could make a meager living off selling pictures of famous Vienna landmarks which he copied from postcards. But he did not work alone. Another resident in his home, Reinhold Hanish, had played the role of his agent in selling Adolfs work. Their partnership did not last long though due to an argument the two got into over whether or not Hanish had stolen some of Adolfs works. He had brought Hanish to court and had landed him an eight day jail sentence. By the time Hanish had gotten back to the home, Adolf had left without as much as a goodbye. He went on to sell more of his artwork to stores who would use them as fillers for empty picture frames. This only went on till he was about 21, when his interest in politics had taken over and led him down a different path.

So what has now become of the Hitler works? They are floating around the art world selling for less than you would expect. From filler paintings that were only meant to accompany empty picture frames to works going for $69,999.99, there is a valuable lesson to be learned. Your artwork can be nothing more than street art and its true value will only be judged on the life you live.

P.S. I would like to take some time out to mention that if Adolf had not followed a life of politics, antisemitism, and was 21 right now... he would be Adolf Hipster.

Day 7: Re-birthing of a Dead Idea

New York is Finally Taking Its Coffee Seriously

and you should be too! Read up and drink something real for once.

So I had started this blog several months ago and I think I had something good going, but school got in the way. Now I am a working man trying to make a living in modern times. By that I mean I am trying to find any barista job I can get my hand on.

You, the non-existent reader might be asking, what's going to be different?

Nothing. It will be pointless ramblings of a person consumed in the mass of NYC

who needs to feel like he is doing something productive with his life.

What can I expect to see?

Random photos, history on pointless topics, and whatever I get my hands on.

Why should I read this?

No clue. Why are you reading this?

I wish I had more to say in this entry, but sadly enough this is just me reinstating my blog.

See you tomorrow.

Day 6: Lil' wayne

I will start of by saying that I enjoy listening to Lil' Wayne and honestly, I think its weird if you don't like him. He might be the only rapper who can make a career out of bullshitting his way through rhyming during a song. Don't get me wrong, he at least makes sure his lyrics rhyme... but he sometimes he just says the most ridiculous things.

Let me provide some examples:

"I'm all about my cake, I'm trying to marry Betty Crocker"

"She says she eats her vegetables so she stays alive, so she slobbed on my knob like corn on the cob"

"I'm a young money millionaire, tougher than Nigerian hair. My criteria compared to your career just isn't fair. I'm a venereal disease like a menstrual bleed"

"You pop 'em 'cause we pop 'em like Orville Redenbacher"

"I wear 8 chains. I mean so much ice, they yell 'Skate Wayne'"

"I Make More Than I Can Fit In This Quote"

I would get more quotes off the Internet right now if i wasn't exhausted from a day of smoking as many cigarettes as I could get my hands on as well as a day of classes that was seemingly never ending. But to expand on the genius known as Lil Wayne... he's clearly aware of how outrageous all of his lyrics are yet they make him the money that all rap stars want.

The one thing that I want to talk about that disturbs me deeply is that there are females out there that find Lil Wayne attractive. I understand that he's filthy rich and a rap superstar but the fact that he's below 5'5", has grills and is covered in unsightly scars for some reason doesn't appeal to me at all. Perhaps it's his brilliance as a lyricist, although I doubt that the multitude of "hos" he's always surrounded by care too much about that.

Premise one: All pimps have hos.

Premise two: Lil Wayne has hos.

Conclusion: Lil Wayne is a pimp.

I have used undeniable logic to prove the "Lil Wayne is a pimp" theory.

Day 5: Lazy day

Today was my last lazy day, hence why I am updating the blog. Ive had from Friday till today off, but I'll be attending my classes tomorrow...which means I get to see people again. No I'm not anti-social and yes I have friends, its just that during break I tend to do a lot more nothing then something. This also comes down to the fact that I don't have a job, therefore I can not keep productive in my life.

That brings me to something that really grinds my gears. In Park Slope, there are a million restaurants which all potentially have jobs open. It always seems like a great idea but then there is always "Must have experience". I honestly have not found a damn restaurant that doesn't ask for and experienced staff. How the hell am I supposed to gain experience if no other place will hire me on the pretence that I have no skill. It seems pointless to be looking a waiting job.

Chances are I'll drag my ass over to gamestop and whatever the hell else I can find and just cross my fingers. Or I can just begin to stalk craigslist every day till a job pops up. As I look through the listings, I'm starting to think this will be a lost cause.. But I wont give up. Hopefully some bullshit job will come along that doesn't require experience, just a big smile.

Day 4: Pog Warfare

By this post, I have come to the realization that there can never be a guaranteed entry for the night because of certain social events. Three days into new classes and I've already drank two of those nights, but this is not what I'm here to talk about. I was sitting on the Brooklyn College quad with some friends, having some chit chat when this amazing 90's fad came up.

Wtf ever happened to pogs?

As some have told me, "It was just another one of those stupid fads, why do you love them?" Maybe it was because the slammers were always awesome... or maybe because if you knew how to kick some serious ass at the play ground in Pogs, you would love them too. Besides that, I'm here to get down with the history of the Pog.

Pogs were one of the great 90's fads that have come and gone, but besides that.. where did they come from. Research into the game's origin shows me that the concept for the game first originated during 1920's in Hawaii on the island of Maui, where workers from a bottle cap company started the game. The only problem is that it doesn't account for the 60-70 years between then and the 1990's. One source tells me that it was a Hawaiian school teacher that reintroduced the fad 70 years later... improbable? I think so. Further research into the phenomenon known as Pogs shows me that it has very little relation to its namesake, a drink named POG that consists of a blend of juices from passion fruit, oranges, and guava fruits. It was said that the caps would be used for the game, but by the 1990's glass bottles were rarely used, meaning that the POG juice that was distributed in the states did not use the caps. So if that wasn't how the craze came over the entirety of the United States, how did it? There are two stories of how it went big. It starts with Charlie Nalepa who was hired as a marketing and promotions manager for the Hawaiian Haleakala Dairy company. He saw that there was a large demand for the cardboard discs that came with the milk. POGS printed their logo and used it as a promotional strategy for their drink. It seems as if the drink was forgotten and the Pogs lived on. The second story is the reintroduction of Pogs, from classroom to nationwide fad. In 1991, there was a fifth grade teacher in a Haywain elementary school who introduced the game as a way to learn math. Of course there are rumors of other elementary school teachers doing this or similar, so what I can take from this is that multiple teachers had similar ideas for using Pogs as a math game or just fun in the yard. This created central points of popularity of the game, leading it to spread fairly fast.

Of course there is the Milkman POG conspiracy. Groups believe that the fad was actually spread milk truck to milk truck around Hawaii till one lone milkman known by Johhny "white stach" Butifler was transferred to a west coast milk company. This is where he introduced the introduced the Hawaiian game and learned that it had not been taught anywhere outside of Hawaii. He decided to travel milk company to milk company teaching people about the game known as "Milkcaps". After most of the country had been exposed to the game, the POG juice company had caught on and mass produced the cardboard discs, changing the game forever. There is little to no evidence to prove this theory, but it has traveled by mouth for centuries.

Name of the game:

Pogs

Milkcaps

Milk Covas

Pog facts more useless than knowing the orgin of Pogs

• In 1992, the milkcap game became so popular that milkcap tournaments were held and milkcap collecting became a phenomenon known as “Milkcap Mania.” The phenomenon created such frenzy; it made CNN's national headline news.
• An international company reached $150,000,000 in sales in the United States and Milkcaps won the “Toy of the Year” in the UK
• By 2000 there were up to 10 pages of milkcap auctions online at Ebay.
• In 2001, the U.S. military issued milkcaps as a form of currency during Operation Iraqi Freedom andOperation Enduring Freedom. It is stated that metal coins were too costly and heavy to ship to the Middle East. The milkcap currency for the War in Iraq is still used today and accepted at exchanges worldwide. For coin and milkcap collectors there are 8 different printings sought after.

(facts stolen from http://www.alohamilkcaps.com/new_site/phenomenon.asp, thanks)

For those still interested, there are still people selling Pogs on ebay at decent prices if you have a disposable income for things such as Pogs.

Just in case anyone is wondering how to play the game, I have given you a convenient link to the rules.

http://v1.milkcapmania.co.uk/howtoplay.html

As for any other research that will be done on the topics of Pogs, it will not be done by me because if I say the word "pogs" again in my head I will probably have an aneurysm. Now I may go to sleep knowing that my head is swarming in useless information.

Day 3: The Rabbit and the Hare

It's a good four hours before I'll be waking up for classes, so I thought this would be a good time to update the blog about useless shit. I just got my tattoo today and it was an interesting experience like both other times. I guess I couldn't explain any better about how I felt than how I did in my last post. I went through the nervous habits and all. Finally when that needle was in me, it wasn't all that bad. It was an uncomfortable feeling but as for the pain level, it was easy enough to stomach. So overall, it was a walk through the park with a wedgie. It only came out to 100 bucks and I'm glad with that.

I'm a bit tired so I really can't stay up to rant about anything to its entirety, so I'll have to settle on something small. I was in my statistics class the other day when my professor was going over a PowerPoint presentation. He pointed out in one picture that a man was examining a hare. At that point my mind drifted from the lesson and onto the topic of "who still uses the term hare" and "what is the real definition of the word 'hare'." After long thought about the use of the term "hare" instead of rabbit, I concluded that if you could fit it into a sentence (which for some reason you are speaking of rabbit) and it doesn't sound completely out of place... go for it! We could use a little change in our lives. But then I found out the true definition.

"Hares and jackrabbits are leporidaes belonging to the genus Lepus.

(There are four other species called hares: Caprolagus or the Hispid Hare, and Pronolagus or the red rock hares.)

Hares less than one year old are called leverets."

(stolen from the all knowing god Wikipedia.com)

So now that really fucks my plan over

because unless you are specifically talking about this breed of the genus Lepus,

you would be incorrect.

Thank you professor Grasso,

but you were wrong.

Good night.